Three little pigs

There were once three brothers. They were all pigs.

Although they were quite cute when they were piglets, with their tiny little trotters and shiny pink noses, they grew up to be boisterous and troublesome. By the time they were teenagers, their Dad had reached the end of his tether and told them to go and make their own way in the world.

The eldest of the piggy-wigs, Curly, thought he had found a licence to print money when he saw an advertisement in the careers office to train as an Accountant. He reckoned he was quite good at sums so immediately applied and was miraculously accepted. Over the next couple of years, he learned how to screw more out of a job than the effort he put in, passed his exams with mediocre results and joined a local firm. Even though he did not actually produce anything, he was paid £30 thousand a year and considered himself to be very important indeed. His student loan was £35k, but he tried not to think about that.

The middle brother, Snout, not to be outdone, enrolled in the local Law School. He enjoyed drinking games, wearing stupidly long scarves and brogues. After a few short years, he managed to qualify and secured a job with a local practice. He left no pointless letter unwritten or telephone call un-logged in his quest to preserve the tradition of doing very little actual work whilst charging his clients exorbitant fees. Even though he did not produce anything, he also was paid £30 thousand a year and considered himself to be very important indeed. His student loan was £35k, but he tried not to think about that.

The youngest of the piggy-wig brothers, Trott, chose an entirely different path. He was by far the most curious of the brothers and wanted to have adventures. So he took what little money his dear old Dad was able to give him and travelled far and wide. He worked all over the world, in bars, fields and factories and learned to work skillfully with his trotters. People he met along the way were only too happy to teach the eager young piggy-wig the wondrous lessons of life. He had very little but did not need much and as often as not gathered his food freely from the sea or from hedgerows and slept under the stars. Of course, he also mixed liberally with the lady piggy-wigs. Oh, the sights he saw and the experiences he had! But all good things must come to pass and the time came when he must return home, to settle down and maybe have a piglet family of his own.  He was looking forward to telling his father and brothers of his amazing adventures.

After a long journey, he arrived at his father’s house but there was no one to welcome him. He discovered that his brothers were far too busy being important and had sent their father to a rest home for embarrassing old pigs. Trott was disappointed but not downhearted and decided to find his own place to live and get a proper job. On passing by the local college, he noticed a poster promoting courses in plumbing, so he enrolled. He was good with his trotters and no stranger to hard work and, within a year, much to the amusement of his “professional” brothers, he had a qualification and embarked on his trade with enthusiasm. Despite fierce competition, he quickly built his earnings up to and beyond £30 thousand pounds a year. He had no debts or anxiety and always found the time to visit his dear old dad at the rest home and his brothers at the sanitarium.

There’s a moral here somewhere.


Comment below or write to me: rod@rivenrod.com

© Rivenrod 2021

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